I don't know how many of you are familiar with the Red Room, a site where authors blog and such, but I was over there today reading a list of literary articles from the Onion. Some of them are just hilarious and I wanted to recount a few here:

Ghost Of Anne Frank: "Quit Reading My Diary"

Shocked to learn that the diary containing her most intimate thoughts and feelings has been read by millions of people worldwide, the ghost of Anne Frank held a press conference Monday to tell the world to "stop reading my diary, and put it back where you found it right this second."

*Entire article

Rapture Wreaks Havoc On Local Book Club

MARION, IN—Following last week's rapture, which transported four members of the Marion Mockingbirds Book Club to heaven in order to be with Jesus Christ, the three remaining members have reportedly been scrambling to maintain a regular Wednesday meeting schedule as well as the usual coffee-and-pastry rotation.

*Entire article

Toaster-Instruction Booklet Author Enraged That Editor Betrayed His Vision

TOWSON, MD—Consolidated Concepts copywriter Ronald Leff announced Monday that his vision for the Black & Decker Electronic Toast-R-Oven™ Broiler instruction booklet was "thoroughly betrayed" in the final editing process.

*Entire article

First-Time Novelist Constantly Asking Wife What It's Like To Be A Woman

SAN JOSE, CA—Claims adjuster and novice author John Kitner is "constantly" asking what it's like to be a woman, reports his wife Becky.

*Entire article

The entire list can be found at the Red Room.